Over the river, through the woods, and frisked by the TSA

It's that time of year again! Tis the season to spend wads of cash on airline tickets and get boned.

The airline industry is the worst! You spend $400 for something, you expect it to be exactly what you signed up for. Not with the airlines.

By the time I'm ready to fly home to Cali for the Xmas holiday, my flight will be changed, layovers will be lengthened and luggage will be lost. It happens every time. A couple days before I'm suppose to take off, the emails start filling my box:

"There has been a change in your flight itinerary."

Really? Cuz I paid you ass-munches $400 for that specific itinerary!

Let's put it this way....say you buy a box of cereal at the market. You roll it up to the register, you mentally kick yourself for forgetting your environment friendly bag, and you pay. Now maybe you paid a lil more for this box of fiber that promises youth and proper bowel movements, but what's wrong with paying a lil extra.

The next morning you wake up to someone knocking on the door. It's the cashier from the market. "I'm sorry...I have to take your cereal back...you can't eat that till tomorrow." How many of us would gladly hand the cereal back and say, "Oh...no problem. I was going to have eggs this morning anyway. I'll see you tomorrow to pick it up again."

F-NO you wouldn't. It would be more like, "WTF??? I bought that goddamn cereal and I'll eat it when I want it. And if you even THINK about stepping into this house, I will shoot you."

Cuz you love your crunch berries, damn it!

But when the airlines drop a lil letter bomb in your email, we sigh, bend over, and take it right up the pooper!

Why is it not illegal? It sure feels like it. You can't bait and switch at stores anymore. They found that to be illegal. And you would think with such a high priced ticket item, it would seem even more important not to screw folks over.

Maybe it's the fear that if you make a stink, you might not ever get on the plane. You don't dare take that option where they offer you free tickets to wait for the next flight. You could wait till New Year's Eve!

Nope...it doesn't pay to be the squeaking wheel on the landing equipment. Maybe Santa can bring me a private jet and shove it in my stocking. Cuz I'm about ready to shove something up the airlines chimney.