I think I've written about the family cabin, my folks mindlessly tossed on the market and sold out from under us kids.
It's an open-wound....still.
And I think I've mentioned that I've had problems dreaming about my dad, since his death. I can admit I'm still not ready to open myself up completely to him 'visiting' me in some dream world. I've 'visited' with other relatives after they have passed, but this...this is still so fresh and raw.
The closest I've come to having him in a dream was seeing him in reflections while everyone else saw him clear as day.
I don't need my dream analysis book to figure that one out.
Last night I dreamt my folks and I were setting fire to our family cabin to get rid of it. My dad telling me where to put wood and paper to spread the fire that would burn the place to the ground.
My waking moment came when I tried to write on an exposed beam, "Poppa, don't be mad." Cuz you see...he built it. My grandfather, so the story goes, "Carried the main beam on his shoulder while Nan read a book on 'how to build a house' to him."
This is the same cabin my folks decided to sell and never bothered to ask us if we were even interested in keeping it in the family.
As I tried to finish my dream note on the pine beam, under the stairs, the ink ran out of the marker before i could finish the message.
I woke to tears and wondering if my parents asked for my grandfather's forgiveness before the heartlessly sold our cabin.
I know they sure didn't ask it from us kids.
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